Opening messages and matches

Ontryst doesn't require a mutual match before anyone can speak to you. That's the main thing to understand about how conversations start here.

Opening messages ("crush")

You can send one opening message to someone you haven't matched with. It arrives in their Conversations like any other message, and they can reply or ignore it.

This means:

• You can start a real conversation without waiting for a mutual like.
• You can receive messages before you have any matches at all. A conversation appearing when your matches list is empty is normal, not a glitch.

Because it lands directly in someone's inbox, an opening message that refers to something on their profile does far better than "hi". You get one; make it specific.

How many you get

Right now, opening messages are free and unlimited. Ontryst is free while we grow — see Is Ontryst free? — so nothing here is rationed or sold.

If we ever do put a limit on them, the app will tell you at the point of sending rather than failing silently.

Matches

A match is the mutual case: you both liked each other. Matches appear in your matches list and open a conversation the same way.

You don't need a match to talk, but a match is a stronger signal — both people have already said yes.

Where messages arrive

Everything lands in Conversations — the matches tab on mobile, Discussions on the web. If yours looks empty and you were expecting something, see I can't see my messages.

If someone bothers you

Every profile and conversation has a report and block option. Blocking removes them from your discovery and stops them contacting you. What's not allowed is set out in the Community Rules.